I mentioned in my first Fetus Friday post that I’m planning to plan. Basically, getting mentally ready before getting physically ready. Lining up my mental ducks before taking aim at them one by one and shooting them down. Duck soup anyone? In some ways, there is a LOT less to consider this time around. In other ways, there is more.
With my first, we were completely unprepared. Four weeks early, we had no car seat installed, no clothes washed, no diapers, no….nothing.
With my second, I methodically scrubbed the house down, prepared post-partum meals, put friends on red alert for late night phone calls, tried out names in my mind (and on the walls) for months, and had everything basically ‘set’. Except for the delivery, all went smoothly enough.
This time? I have no idea yet. I have a hard time making ‘real’ plans because my babies tend to say ‘surprise mom’, break my water, and send me to the hospital. My DOCTOR wants to schedule a C-section with enough time for this not to be an issue, given my 2 prior emergency evictions after hours of painful but non-effective labor. Surgery is risky, but I’ve come through surgery.. um wow… 4? 5? times now and healed beautifully. Maybe a little more pudgy given my abdominals have been cut through so many times, but nevertheless, whole. And at this point I can’t help but agree, my husband’s 6’1 frame and my 5’2 frame make for huge babies that don’t want to use the normal exit. I won’t be guilted or made to feel bad for this. My doctor knows whole-heartedly that it’s NOT what I would choose. She’s been through this with me before. She put her foot down and I said, ‘okay’. I have to believe that it’s the right thing. In fact, I went into this KNOWING she would say that. I’m fine with it (even if it does sadden me)– because it’s what’s best for my own health. Bring on the scalpel and let me see my baby without conking out from exhaustion? Yes please!
So yeah, my babies don’t always see to plan. So I’ve decided to stay out of the birth planning. No really. My doctor is going to set the surgery date. My husband will find out the surgery date, and will tell me either the night before, or that morning. I’ll trot in with a good night’s sleep and meet my baby! (you know, unless all hell breaks loose– if that happens, I go in immediately for surgery and still am at least partially awake because I won’t have gone through 20+ hours of labor). Either way, it’s going to be a surprise. My doctor was surprised, but she thought it was a fabulous idea. I asked her for the hospital that pampered the moms the most (since I’m not getting anything else I want) and she informed me about the one with the best food and the best care in her opinion. It’s not the hospital she currently works for and where my other 2 were delivered. That’s going to be undergoing construction when this baby comes, and moms will be shunted to the ‘sick’ part of the hospital. Glad I asked! Be in with all those germs of people in for flu or what have you? No thank you!
We’re also being surprised by the baby’s sex. We have done that both other times and we were thrilled with the ‘fun’ of it. We skip on all the ‘extra’ testing as well. It would just make me worry too much. We do indulge in ultrasounds, and I always thought of them as a growth type of thing, but apparently I found out with my last little one that 96% of issues can be detected via ultrasound (what’s leftover is heart issues basically). So there is that coming up in a couple of weeks and I’ll post a picture then.
In the meantime I’ll be pondering meal plans, dragging out totes of clothes to go through, taking a diaper inventory, etc. Wish me luck. I’m still not planning anything, just planning to plan. That way, I never have plans spoiled 😉