Faye is our hostess for Fun Monday. She wants to know: Do you also have that “Back to School” feeling even though you’re all grown up? As your host for this week’s Fun Monday, and perennial student myself, I’m asking you to share your thoughts on the importance of lifelong learning.
Back to school! Back to school! This time of year has to be one of my favorites. Not necessarily for the weather, although I do tend to like it when I step outside and shiver in short sleeves, that has yet to happen, although I’m sure it will be soon. I always loved back to school time, because it meant new crayons, pens and pencils, and new adventures. At school I had access to more books, could talk to friends, and learn new things.
Even when I went to college and subsequently thereafter, I have purchased new crayons. In college, during finals week I would get out crayons and coloring books and sit in the hallway in my residence hall (dorm) and start to color. Those emerging from their own studying to use the bathroom or get some quality computer time in (e-mail), would cock their heads sideways, grin and ask if they could play. Needless to say our RA found us all outside her doorway, scribbling away on heavily cartooned pictures of puppies, kittens and so forth from the ‘$1 coloring book’. After college I bought crayons for nieces or nephews and sneak an extra one in for myself, and when I got to having unused packs in my desk drawer, I stopped. This year I got to buy some more for a nephew whose mother is going back to school and needed some help, and I found an unused pack in my desk drawer, adorned it with stickers and put it in the bag for his little sister, who is about 4.
The point of this Fun Monday is to see what we would like to learn. From high school, I didn’t keep many friends, and although I have caught back up with a few over the internet, we aren’t close. After college, I was determined to keep in touch and avoid those ‘situational’ friendships that had petered out after HS. 5 of us from college still email (and I have another friend who isn’t part of the group but I get to e-mail regularly nonetheless) and I’ve sent out the blog address, although I think one reads regularly and the rest either never looked or didn’t care to keep up, which is fine. It’s not everyone’s cup of tea to listen to me rant and offer advice. The point of all this? How do I learn to make new friends I might actually see from time to time, get to have a coffee with, and giggle over? I don’t expect anything fabulous. As adults, we’re all busy with our lives and it’s hard to know how to get to know someone. So how do you do it? Or if you were me? We are still fairly new in town and I’ve been friendly to all the clerks and such I’ve come in contact with, but other than shopping, I don’t do a whole lot. All the other ‘walkers’ I’ve come across have headphones in, even walking with a baby in stroller, so they’re totally tuned out to the outside world. We also haven’t settled on a church yet, the one we have gone to does have quite a few young couples, but with our baby needing a nap right after services, we don’t get time to just ‘say hello’ to anyone before bundling her off to be nursed and put down. So how can I make new friends? That’s what I would like to learn this year.
I do know a few people who need extreme makeovers in learning, particularly one of the contractors we considered hiring and the doctor I went to in order to get a referral for the pain in my belly that I’ve been having for a few months. They need refresher courses in their fields. Please feel free to scroll down and check out what I mean, and why I want to invest in duck suits!
I too share your love of office supplies Jill–especially colored pens, pencils and cool notebooks. You can never have enough color in your office supplies. On my blog I have to be mindful about excessive ink font colors and too many photos and graphics.
Sounds like school was a place for you to be near friends and now, as an adult, building meaningful friendships is a bit tricky. I hear you. The challenge is to keep a few close friendships and nurture them. It’s hard because our interests and priorities often differ from even closest friends. Some of my friends don’t understand the obsession we have with the blogosphere! But life would be very dull without blogging buddies–and think of all we learn from each other.
Making new friends is really difficult at any stage in ones life. I think I’m in a similar position to you now I’ve retired. In the past 3 years I’ve not really made any new friends but have lost a lot of contact with many of the people I used to work with and who were the ‘friends’ I socialised with after work. They all still work so although I tried to organise things it became difficult and gradually I gave up. Having said that my friend, Tina (who I sometimes go on holiday with has introduced me some of her friends and I get invited to the occasional dinner).
Do you have things like mother and baby groups, where you can go for coffee? This can be a good way of meeting other mothers with young children.
Making new friends takes work and time. It gets harder as you get older. This is just a phase in your life right now. Dont worry, when your child starts school you will meet all kinds of Moms who are just like you. My youngest daughter is going through the very same thing right now..but it is starting to turn around. Her oldest is starting school and her one neighbor has the same age child so they have become friends and share play dates. Thanks for sharing and happy FM. I am hosting next week, so come on over and sign up this wed. 🙂
I didn’t know any other stay at home moms when that’s what I first became. I was so lonely – you know how I NEED to talk! I spent a lot of time on the phone with my grandma, since she was the only one home during the day. And strangely enough, eventually my father-in-law, once he retired. It was amazing how long he would talk to me when his wife wasn’t home 🙂
I don’t really have an answer to your problem. It didn’t get better for me until Jacob was over a year and a half and I started going to the park district for a play group. It was a dollar to go for 2 hours, and that’s where I met all of the mothers I know now. There are many moms that I talk with in passing and comment on their facebook accounts, but only a few that I actually do other things with, but they’re the ones I picked to keep doing stuff with.
We are now closer to the people at church. They didn’t talk to us much until after we had Jacob. Then people started talkign to us, but again, it wasn’t until I started spending time in the nursery with Lauren while Jacob was at Sunday school. I really enjoy that time and am sad about when she starts sunday school too, and I have no reason to stay in the nursery.
So I have no real advice. Just sympathy and understanding. Unfortunately, it’s not at all uncommon, and the older you get, the harder it is to make friends.
Oh, once you start going to the park, that’s good, too.
On several occasions, I’ve been caught red-handed sniffing the Crayola crayons in Office Depot…once the clerk moves on, I head to the erasers, the notebooks, and finally, yes, you guessed it…the glue.
Just popped over from Faye’s…quack quack…quackquackquack.
I love office/school supplies! But I admit that if I didn’t have a job, I don’t know how I would meet new friends. I’m not terribly sociable, don’t hang out in bars or join groups. I suppose I could go to church and do it that way – or check into a mother’s group of some sort.
Hmn… the smell of new crayons – 🙂
I was getting low on friends this year so I decided to sell Avon. What better way to meet people?! I’ve already met some of my neighbors that lived here for years and we never knew each other’s names.
Nice post – quack!
I heart back to school time. Amen.
Have you looked for mom’s groups in your area – sometimes you can find them through churches, it doesn’t even have to be your own church.
I don’t know how “out there” you are, geographically, but there are usually short, inexpensive mommy and me classes at rec centers that can also be a good way to meet potential friends.
Then again, what do I know? Many of my best mom friends I only know through the internet.
Oh – that reminds me that our local paper actually sponsors an online community of local moms, so if there’s something like that in your area that may also be a good place to start.
I’m going shopping with my daughter later today to buy new stationery for school. I don’t know who’s more excited, me or her. Probably me, as I love buying new notepads, pens, etc and I’m not the one returning to school!
I do love the smell of fresh crayons!! Making new friends will come easy once your little one has started pre-school. I know that seems like a long way off, but it will come around sooner than you think. How about mommy and me groups?
There really I don’t know how you could make new friends. It just happened to me I met them at school or in the office or lately in my painting courses. Usually once I am friend with somebody it’s for the whole life. My oldest friend I know since 1951 !!
I love crayons too, we used to have a coloring group at work and you could go over at lunch with your $1 coloring book and color away. Unfortunately my 19 months old boys loves to color more than paper, he colors the wall…yuk!